Welcome to the place for the essential Monty Python and the Holy Grail sounds!
Just click on the link to have a listen. Most waves are recorded at 11khz.
"I'm French. Why do you think I have this outrageous accent, you silly king-a?!"
"What, is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?"
"What is your favorite color." (Although he said it 'colour'.)
How to opperate the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.
"Every time I try to talk to someone it's 'Sorry' this and 'Forgive me' that."
"No chance English bed-wetting types."
"I'll bite your legs off!"
"Bloody peasent!"
"What are you going to do, bleed on me?"
"Go and boil your bottoms, sons of a silly person!"
"Consult the Book of Armaments!"
"Who are the Britains?"
"I warned you but did you listen to me, oh no, you no, didn't you. Oh, it's just a harmless little bunny isn't it?!"
"What are you doing in England?" "Mind your own bussiness!"
"You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangn' 'em together."
"Cut down a tree with a herring?"
"Bring out your dead!"
A dramatic chord.
"What an ecentric performance."
"Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoop-boing-goodem-zoo-owli-zhiv."
"I mean, if I went 'round sayn' I was an emperor just because some miostened bint had lobed a scemitar at me, they'd put me away!"
"I fart in your general direction!"
"Get on with it." "Yes, get on with it." "Yes, get on with it!"
"Good idea, O Lord." "Course it's a good idea!"
"A grrrail?"
"Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries!"
"Oh bloody 'ell"
"You must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest . . .with . . .a HERRING!"
"I'm invinsable!"
"I blow my nose at you, so-called Arthur King, you and all your silly English knnnnnnnnnnniggets!"
"Ni!" "Ni!" "Ni!" "Ni!" "Who are you?" "We are the Knights Who Saaay . . . Ni!" "No, not the Knights Who Say Ni!" "The same."
"Pull the other one."
"You know much that is hidden, O Tim." "Quite."
"That's no ordinary rabbit. That's the most foul, cruel, and bad tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!"
A Frenchman razzing King Arthur.
"Help, help, I'm being repressed!"
Brave Sir Robin ran away.
"'Tis but a scratch."
"You seek the Holy Grrrail."
"A shrubbery!"
"Another shrubbery!"
"Shrubberies are my trade. I am a shrubber. My name is Roger the Shrubber."
"Shut up will you shut up?!"
"On second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place."
"You silly sod!"
"I'm getting better." "No you're not. You'll be stone dead in a moment."
"What do you mean, an African or European swallow?"
"You can't expect to wield sumpreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you."
"Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time."
"Death awaits you all with nasty, big, pointy teeth!"
"There are some who call me . . . Tim?"
"Saint Antila raised the hand grenade up on high saying, 'O Lord, bless this thine hand grenade, which with it you mayds't blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.'"
"Come and see the violence inherent in the system!"
"I am your king." "Well I didn't vote for you."
"You tiny-brained wipers of other peoples' bottoms."
"We've found a witch, may we burn her?"
"All right, all right, we'll kill him first, and then have tea and biscuits."
"In this picture there are 47 people. None of them can be seen."
"Albatros!"
"Are you gay?" "I should very say so old fruit."
"Is this the right room for a argument?"
"Do you want, do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy!" "I don't think you're using that right." "You great buff." "That'll be 6 and 6 please." "If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? I am no longer infected." "May I, um, may I?" "Yah, yah" "6 and 6, 6 and 6, ah. (something in hungarian) Aahh!"
"Now that's what I call a dead parrot."
"Oh, my nipples explode with delight!"
"And now for something completely different."
"Yes, we are all different." "I'm not."
"This is an ex-parrot!"
"Pining for the fjords?!"
"Go ahead, be crucifed, see if I care."
"My hovercraft is full of eels."
"We interupt this program to anoy you and make things generally irritating."
"Stop that, it's silly."
"Crucifixtion?" "Yes." "Good. Out of the door, line on the left, one cross each."
The Lumberjack Song.
No it's not dead, it's resting."
"Hush dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your Spam. I love it. I having Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, baked beans, Spam, Spam, Spam, and Spam.
"I will not buy this record, it is scratched."
"The 127th Upper-class Twit of the Year Show!"
"Mrs. Smegma, would you stand up please."
E-mail me at psmith@huntcol.edu
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